After some slightly self-confronting realizations, honest discussion, and soul-searching, we finally came to a temporary stopping place on our topic on wholeness entitled:
"Naked Genius -- Being the Difference We Want to See in the World."
(Thanks to the willing participation of so many in these conversations, there are some wonderfully insightful comments in that topic and in all of our previous topics. And now, thanks to the continuing advances of web widgets, you'll find a handy new tool in the lower right-hand side of the blog that provides a better glimpse of those topics for your convenience)
So, with a desire to advance in other fertile directions, a conspiracy of your fellow bloglings suggested this topic. The real idea here is to assume (and please, suspend disbelief, if you must) that what happens in the world at-large is a reflection of the inner world for each us (and as a collective). If this were true, how might some of our more confronting situations in the world be a reflection back to us of opportunities and challenges before us.
In the spirit of past topics, we're still looking to continually move out of denial (as much as might be possible) and head toward the light in an effort to get a more clear look at the possibility that we are a whole within a whole -- and how that notion might guide us and allow us to tap into our inner genius to find a better, more lasting, productive, and compassionate way.
Your thoughts, questions, confusion, and humor are most welcome,
Christopher
P.S. As always remember that to see the comments in a separate window, click on the "Comments" link. To see the comments in the body of the topic, click "Links to this Post"
Views of those commenting have not been checked for accuracy and do not necessarily reflect the views of this blog publisher or his associates.
Ohhh! You guys are very, very bad. I love it. I'm going to have to give this some very serious thought, but now it gets interesting.
ReplyDeleteKudos!
Ellio
Well, I must say, this is a fresh way to approach a topic. I'd like to pretend that I don't need to suspend my disbelief some, but I feel an internal resistance to the notion that these dramatically challening world conditions have something to do with my state of mind (getting rather Jungian, are we?).
ReplyDeleteLooking at it on a personal level though -- the one place where I seem to have a good measure of control -- I must say that it is my willingness to ignore my own well being and care, and my unwilligness to notice the havoc that I meet out on those around me that most relates to these larger manifestations. These and my need to be right and to have my way (even while smiling and putting on my enlightened-corporate-leader face).
Damn you! Just when I had myself convinced that these world issues were someone else's problem to solve, you've brought it right back home to me, starting with me in my own immediate sphere of influence).
Truthfully, I have always known this underneath it all -- but it helps to have a direct reminder and such a well placed invitation to stare it all in the face yet again.
Yours truly,
WC
WC, I have been looking for an opportunity to ask you this ever since your last post re: your near-death experience, and you just gave it to me.
ReplyDeleteI understand that something like that is one of the most deeply personal things that can happen, and I fully respect whatever position you need to take regarding my question, up to and including "A pox on thee, BKO, thou scurvy, intrusive knave!" Trust me, I won't be offended, because you'd be far from the first.
Without feeling any pressure to divulge details sacred to you, would you be willing to talk to us about some of what changed in you because of your experience?
I only dare ask because you've already mentioned it, and because based on my experience with others in my life who've had them, there is much in there that may be germane to what we're trying to open up here and keep stumbling on.
Hello BKO, I'm providing a quick response for WC who's on a flight today. He'll get back to you tomorrow or over the weekend.
ReplyDeleteSince I’m already here, I'll take this opportunity to dabble in your blog for a moment (he and Michelle are always talking about it) and give you my response to your question since I've known WC for years [both “before” and now “after”] and have worked along side him as his executive assistant and administrator.
WC has always been a very astute business leader -- one who's very pragmatic, and who has had the respect of his colleagues -- truth is, he is a very savvy, highly intelligent man. Since his near death experience, however, (and I'll defer to him to share any details he wishes about that event), he has added a new dimension to his leadership and interpersonal side that I would classify as "heart."
While WC has always been amiable and upbeat with his people, he now brings a genuine concern and care about them. Mixed with his pragmatic nature, I believe it's made him an even better decision-maker, because he takes that very pertinent aspect into his thought process and understands how it impacts applicable processes. What this has done is create an even more loyal workforce and developed even more dedicated people who believe in the expanded vision he's created for our organization.
I hope my perspective is helpful to you in your dialogue.
Kind regards,
Susie
Thank you, Susie, for handling WC's interim response.
ReplyDeleteThis topic is interesting because it is not far from what we promote within our organization. We describe our "brand" as the experience people have of working with us or for us. In other words, we feel that the values of the company have to be modeled and lived by each one of us in order for our vision to be realized and to be fully authentic.
Taking that thought process to the next level, while logical in its progression, is certainly a challenging concept, if one is to take it on with any real degree of seriousness. Playing with the notion intellectually is an exercise that many of us many have toyed with. To not only look at the outward reflection, however, but to suggest that the greater world condition is reflective our own personal challenges is a lot to process.
That said, I think for me personally, recognizing that I have a clear sense of what I think is correct and incorrect; and that I often dissociate myself from people whose values significantly conflict with my own, rather than working with them to find agreed upon common ground -- certainly could be compared (though without the violence) to the Middle East.
I often wonder, and this discussion brings it up again, if we in the U.S. are really as enlightened as we sometimes think we are or if we are simply in the fortunate position of not having to be at a survival level (and thus don't respond day-to-day in the manner that some do in the Middle East and Africa). This convenience also seems to breed complacency though (if it's not on my doorstep, it's not relevant).
That's all for now, but I'm looking forward to hearing more people's thoughts on this as I'm quite curious where this conversation might lead.
Warm regards,
Michelle
A couple of thoughts have run through my head while reading these most recent comments:
ReplyDeleteI wonder why we have to have a near death experience to discover our heart space? (Having died twice, I ask that of myself, especially.)
I wonder why we often think that the problems that are not at our doorstep don't deserve our attention (both from a pragmatic point of view, as well as one of compassion)?
I wonder why we are so easily lulled into complacency and a place of false security?
These questions obviously relate to me because I'm writing them -- but as I observe the world, I have the sneaking hunch they may apply to a few more people as well.
I'd love your thoughts on these and your own questions.
Thanks,
Chris
I labored over finding a polite way to make this comment, but have decided that frankness will probably best serve the discussion.
ReplyDeleteWhat do all of the world conditions share in common with our personal and collective mindset?
Quite simply, I believe that the answer is that these scenarios directly reflect our greed, self-centered focus, desire to maintain a sense of power and control at all costs, and unwillingness to compromise our own comfort for the cause of the greater good.
Where to go from here -- well that's going to require me soaking on this conversation even more and some further input from our collective hosts.
With hope and kind regards,
Ellio
Ellio, you've grown so cynical in your middle age.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, while I do agree with your analysis, I also believe that as more and more people wake up to the radical imbalance of the world's wealth and resources; and to the imbalance of our lives (all about "getting ahead") instead of having a life -- that more and more people are beginning to do things that do make a difference.
Now granted, we're probably not responding with near the dedication and intensity that we need to, but I don't like to breed hopelessness -- that simply seems to lead to the attitude of, "Well, we're barreling down the road on the way to hell, why not just go faster?"
Anybody else have a different take on this?
Sincerely,
Anna
Oddly, perhaps, I understand Ellio's and Anna's points of view (not that they are diametrically opposed). But to answer BKO's very personal, but appropriate question, what has changed for me the most is that I am very aware of people's feelings (and of my own). I didn't lose my pragmatic nature, but it has become balanced, in my experience anyway, with a very deep almost poignant sense of the sanctity of human life -- of the unique value of each human being.
ReplyDeleteI suppose I had an intellectual grasp of the importance and remarkable nature of people prior to my experience, but there is something about the process of watching life slip from you and realizing all that you've missed and how real and incredibly wonderful this opportunity is to be alive that made me come back to life with an unwavering passion to foster life in myself and others.
And yes, as Ellio has commented, I see the greed, the self-centeredness, the grasping for power (I observe it in myself as well). But to Anna's point, I also believe that there is hope -- for when people are genuinely treated with the level of respect, care, and compassion that we are truly capable of sharing with each other -- people step into that more heartfelt, fully human nature of who I believe we are destined to become.
That's the reason Michelle, Susie, and a growing number of our leaders, managers, and staff are expanding our reach beyond our work environment -- into our homes, the community, and beyond. For once we've tasted the joy and deep fulfillment that comes from seeing people's hearts open up and then watching what they bring to life, it ignites a contagious response to create that relationship with others as well.
I've not delivered this particular message quite so directly before -- I think I may have been unintentionally dulling it some, in order to have it be "business-appropriate." Even still the actions and sense of purpose behind my motivation and that of others have seemed to transform the nature of our business culture. Now, however, I think it may be time for me to speak even more openly -- as I've done here -- about my personal experience and this deeper reason behind the change that we have initiated in our organization.
Thank you, BKO, for having enough positive "chutzpah" to inquire. The process of preparing an answer has been most helpful. And thanks to Susie for filling in for me with her initial response. I'm glad you've noticed what I've been feeling inside.
With the deeper reflection that's been initiated by preparing my comments, I've also taken a more willing look at the initial questions posed by Christopher in this topic. And I suppose it is the realization of the reality of his suggestion -- that the deeper issues of our world are a reflection of our collective and personal progress (or lack thereof) that in some ways angered me (though I tried to cleverly mask it -- but to little or no avail, as BKO apparently saw right through it).
My justification for being angry was that we have made significant progress around us -- and yet, as I’ve come to more deeply accept, unless we also take into account the deeper issues yet resolved, and include them within our sphere of responsibility (regardless of whether we deem it appropriate to take direct action on those seemingly more far-reaching challenges), we are living in denial of the real challenge and opportunity before us.
This realization has intensified in me, over the last several days, a sense of urgency that makes it essential that those within our reach begin to deepen and extend our own compassionate and pragmatic actions and that we use our voice to encourage more and more people and organizations to do the same in ways that are appropriate for them.
Sincerely,
WC
I'm responding to Christopher's last questions... you know the "how come" questions... which are kind of tragic... in a way.
ReplyDeleteMy answer... is because I think we believe (or want to believe that we're small... not that important as to be able to do or initiate something truly earth-changing)...
I think we are afraid that we will stand alone... that at the end of the day the powers of greed... evil... manipulation are stronger than us... and that we don't have a strong enough love... or conviction to overcome those powers.
Like you said... my soulful friend... I'm speaking for me... but that's what came up when I read your questions.
Pondering, questioning,
JJ the Human Girl
Thanks, JJ.
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you too, to WC. I appreciate your sharing something so personal to you (and I'm glad too, that BKO was willing to give voice to a question that provoked such an insightful response).
I can certainly identify with what you described. Your words ring very true for me following my most recent brush with a dirt nap (almost 14 years ago). It gratefully never quite leaves you, does it?
I'm looking forward to more responses, reactions, thoughts, and questions.
Sincerely,
Christopher
I have probably responded less to the last two topics than any others I've participated in with this group. And, just to clarify, it is not for lack of interest. It is, quite simply, because I've found it very difficult to give voice to all of the thoughts and feelings that rush through my mind and ripple through my body as I read your comments and then contemplate how your words relate to me.
ReplyDeleteHere is the current truth for me. We can no longer hide, my friends, with any degree of integrity, from the fact that we are willing participants in the conditions of our world. It is humbling, at best, to confront the reality that our comfort is of greater import than the gnawing hunger of countless scores of children -- and of adults; it is shameful that we stand by while thousands upon thousands of women are raped; that young men are turned into mercenaries and then turned against their families. That these on-going atrocities continue while we sit back in our lounge chairs and watch the latest episode of whatever it might be, is wildly disconcerting.
Now certainly, there are those like WC and Michelle, and I'm sure others among us who are diligently working to make and be a difference. And for any who fall into that category, may you be blessed with the energy to continue and the influence to change more hearts to do the same.
But I reflect on Christopher's questions -- why do we need to almost die before we experience the willingness (or perhaps gain the clarity) needed to begin to act sanely -- to act with a level of foresight and compassion that we are certainly capable of, but so frequently set aside due to denial?
I personally struggle with these questions and with this topic for those reasons. I think it is highly useful that we speak of these things -- that we call attention to them -- absolutely so. But I also believe there is something that must happen at the experiential level -- whether it be dying; or experiencing the touch of God; or whatever it might be that changes our hearts, minds, and souls -- that moves us so profoundly at the cellular level that we wake up and can stand by no more.
That's what I'm interested in exploring here together. I invite your honest thoughts and gut level comments in this regard. Please, shed some light on this topic -- and as Christopher invited -- let's be open, honest, and naked on these matters. To do otherwise would be a mockery to all we’ve discussed here thus far.
With Sincerity,
Silvio
Silvio, I believe my fellow NDE, Christopher, has experienced what I'm about to describe, because he's made it his professional endeavor -- and that is that not everyone has to nearly die to be moved to action (I’m trusting his own question in that regard was more to elicit discussion than it was his genuine sense of the way things are).
ReplyDeleteThe touch, power, or transmission (that's the term Michelle uses) of the experience of waking up to the more inclusive truth of our capacity as human beings (and the responsibility, joy, and passion that goes with it) can also be passed along to others when we treat them with genuine humanity; when we respect them, provide a path through which they can fulfill their needs; give them the consideration and encouragement they often long for -- and when we hold them and ourselves accountable for doing the same consistently with everyone we encounter throughout our day.
I also find that creating a compelling vision in this regard and being able to communicate the value of that vision is essential. People want to reach out and make a difference. We find that day in and day out. There is reason to have hope because each one of us can pass along to others the power of connectedness.
Is there much work to do? Are there many people who need the experience of being valued and, as a result, held accountable to reach beyond the small-mindedness that most often accompanies our lives? Yes. And there are more and more people engaging in this endeavor all the time.
With profound hope,
WC
Perhaps it is because of my advancing age, but I am most curious as to people's expectations regarding human beings. It also seems very American to believe that waking the human race must be accomplished within a defined timetable (this is not polite to say, even if it is true, and I should be reprimanded).
ReplyDeleteIf what I read is correct, it would also appear that human beings have always been prone to clinging on to what is perceived of as power. Our capacity as people has also been largely limited over the ages to understand and care only about what directly affects our immediate world.
That does not mean that when we awaken to greater vision that we should not follow our urging to share the vision even if we are motoring toward the chasm, as one contributor mentioned.
Perhaps it is not important whether our species survives its own stupidity, but rather whether we are compassionate enough to share loving kindness even when our fate is most uncertain.
This is probably crazy talk, but you seem insistent upon publishing this old man's words.
Thank you for hearing my thoughts,
Trinh
I don't want to jump on the bash the Americans band wagon, being a Canadian (and therefore also a North American). I believe that the U.S. as a collective society (because there are obviously a full continuum of individual ideas and attitudes within any country or society) merely represents a more exaggerated form of what is present elsewhere in the world.
ReplyDeleteCanada, because it remained part of the commonwealth, was able to learn from the drastic lessons of English imperialism. Other European countries, which more directly experienced the effects of the Second World War, also seemed to take on a modified version of their own exploitive past. But the U.S., following the war, learned how to become a dominant world power by finding new means of economic exploitation and cultural exportation.
Due to the rapid increase of technological advancements, many of which have allowed for the hyper-expansion of mass communication means, has further enabled the U.S.'s influence upon the world and upon its own people.
One of the biggest challenges I see within the U.S. culture is that the seeming vast majority of its citizens are unaware of the propaganda they imbibe daily via the media (news, advertisements, programs, magazines). There is a tremendous naiveté' present in most U.S. people and a sense of entitlement as to their country's right to be able to go anywhere in the world, take what they want from that country's resources, set up their own puppet governments, and manipulate the culture.
I realize that I it certainly sounds like I am bashing the U.S., but as mentioned, the U.S. simply stands as a more exaggerated example of what other countries are doing and of the human tendency toward insular thinking, as Trinh has mentioned.
Until we (as a collective earth population -- and as individual societies -- and as individual people) can come face to face with the extent of our own selfishness, I believe that we are in a position of little hope.
That being said, I agree with Trinh. Anyone who even wakes up ever so slightly, should begin to model, as WC has suggested, what Trinh calls loving kindness so that people may begin to have the experience of the type of higher love that could actually, someday, change the nature of how we, as humans, interact with each other and impact the world.
With hope,
Sarah
May I suggest, as one who is neither a U.S. citizen, nor from the province of Canada, that the entire United Kingdom (of which I am part) has contributed most significantly (before and after the Great Wars) to the spread of the left-brained virus with which we have become infected and which manifests the unsatiable addiction to "progress" and acquisitiveness.
ReplyDeleteI might also add that because one's country stands by in a position of neutrality does not excuse her from the crimes that take place around her any more than a person who witnesses a crime or injustice is excused from doing something to intercede or which requires her to come to the aid of those impacted by such acts.
We are all carriers of the virus, my fellow bloglings. Now the real question at hand, is how do we end its rampant spread; how do we innoculate ourselves and others; how do we restore (or perhaps introduce) sanity to a species that seems intent on shitting in its own nest?
With robust conviction,
KBF
I'm not somebody who has any college degrees... and you all are so much smarter than me... I'm sure...
ReplyDeleteBut the answer to the questions Christopher asked seem obvious to me...
"What Might Africa, The Middle East, and Global Warming Tell Us About Our Personal and Collective Mind?"
If we let these types of things go on in our own homes... in our neighborhoods... in our cities... how can we be surprised that they also happen in such a big way in the world.
As long as it's okay to disrespect someone for their race... or their religious beliefs... or their lack of education... or because they are poor... or whatever...
As long as we don't say anything when someone else tries to make a person be "less human" becuz of who they are... then the world... our families... our towns... and we ourselves will be victims of our own cruelty.
Maybe what I'm saying will be beneath everybody's intelligence or something... but I had to speak up cuz I've been reading this for weeks and couldn't sit by any longer.
With Love and Hope for us all,
Lisa Lee
P.S. MM said hello... and told me that we have to type the word verification thing in to keep the robots from answering again... is that true?
Lisa Lee,
ReplyDeleteI've always appreciated the heartfelt openness, honesty, and genuine nature of your comments. Trust me, it's probably our "education" that gets in the way of our seeing things as clearly as you've just stated.
Thank you!
And yes. Word Verification prevents Internet bots from entering responses into our blog. MM is correct (and please tell them hello, in return).
Christopher
I want to add to Christopher's comments to Lisa Lee... because you rock girl!
ReplyDeleteI always read your comments in other posts and thought that you have that raw... open... honest quality that sometimes people have challenges with... but which is so essential to real conversations.
And yes... I've really looked at the conversations around me these last few days... and noticed how often somebody's being dissed... or made to be less valuable... less human, as you say.
I've also noticed that my tendency has been to walk away... change the subject... or say nothing. Yesterday though... I called attention to what was going on... and just asked the question...
"Why do you think we need to tear them down? Why do you think we've never learned how to resolve our issues with other people in a meaningful way?"
People were a little freaked at first... but when I pursued it as pertaining to me too... it led to a great conversation... and an entirely different outcome.
It seems that facing and dealing with this whole subject we've been wrestling with... requires a lot of courage... a willingess to be f#@king uncomfortable... and a commitment to stay the course.
So thanks... Lisa Lee... for making me take it all a step deeper.
More Courageous than Yesterday Girl,
JJ
I'm not really sure where to go from here. Is it possible to get some additional direction as to what you have envisioned for this topic?
ReplyDeleteI have enjoyed everyone's comments, but am lacking a sense of what to add (if anything). Is it time for a new topic or a new twist on this one? Or is it just me?
Yours truly,
Anna
Anna, et al,
ReplyDeletePlease hang in there... this topic is a tough one to get words around. I do know there are a couple of comments in the works that will throw a few more logs (or maybe even some gasoline) on the fire.
Till then,
Christopher
First, thanks WC for your candid and open-hearted responses to my impertinent question. You have given me much to think and feel about as have all the rest of you, as usual. I'm writing fast, because it's late and I have to go to bed. Hopefully it'll make sense in the morning.
ReplyDeleteI know for me, the stuckness at this particular point is exactly the same place we got stuck in the healthcare conversation. That's because as individuals, and therefore as a society, we've allowed ourselves, across the board, to become utterly abstracted from our own life force, even at the most basic, mundane levels. Our food comes from the grocery store and out of tidy, microwave-safe packages. The materials to build our houses come from the lumberyard. In the backs of our minds, we all know where food and wood really come from, but we've conveniently dissociated ourselves from any kind of felt experience related to the sources of what we eat and what we use. We can't move toward anything related to taking care of our health until we've been told by science or the media or at least three of our neighbors that a particular piece of data has been "proven" and is now therefore real. Our own responsibility to develop our capacity for feeling and attention to our own bodies has been deeply compromised. We've even abstracted ourselves from our own relationship dirty work. Anybody ever heard "It's not personal, it's just business", or worse, SAID it? In my experience, that statement usually means that the person saying it is about to do something in the name of "business" that he would never be able to square with his "personal" ethics. He is simply using it as a grotesque euphemism to distance himself from the felt experience of damaging another person because money or power is more important.
We are stuck because we have taken ourselves out of connection to the basic substance of our own lives. And I believe the only reason anything that outrageous could happen is because we've all duped ourselves into moving so fast and becoming so overwhelmed that we can't see it.
After many years of trying, I've actually succeeded in recent months in slowing down somewhat. Many of you are probably ahead of me in this, and I'm not even close to where I want to be, but the view from the slow lane is something I wasn't quite prepared for. Don't get me wrong. I love it. But I wasn't expecting it to be so alarming. I wasn't expecting so much of what I and the rest of society have considered "normal" to suddenly feel so horrific and sick.
We're stuck in this discussion because we can't do any more by simply discussing it. Now we have to, as individuals, go out and DO something, or more accurately STOP doing a number of somethings, even if it starts simply, as Trinh and WC beautifully stated, by incorporating lovingkindness as a basic, non-negotiable requirement in all our dealings. But "knowing" isn't enough. We have to pay what it costs to actually slow down. And it might cost a lot. Do you dare, as Trinh challenged, to do and be less? It might damage your portfolio, and make it harder to get good insurance, and keep you out of the really good meetings, but it doesn't change the fact that down that road is the only place anything is ever going to change.
Maybe something we can do for each other is talk a bit about what that looks like in our lives as we stumble toward figuring out how to do it, day by day, in the mundane world. What are the challenges you face in contemplating it? What resistance do you get from yourself and your world? What kind of mistakes are you making as you make your initial attempts at cutting yourself out of the rat race?
Makes me think of the old Mark Twain quip related to everybody talking about the weather but nobody doing anything about it. Anybody notice that the rain is falling rather hard?
When I first arrived in the US 14 years ago, I recall hearing the “Be all that you can be” commercial sound byte on the radio and shuttering while thinking “aren’t I already all that I can be!?” I still dislike that particular sound byte. I have, however, during recent days of pondering caught myself in the middle of some of my own denial…
ReplyDeleteThroughout the majority of my life I have struggled with depression and eating disorders. My relationship with my physical body is still anything but stellar. I put it (and consequently myself) down all the time. In fact, it has gotten so bad that I don’t even notice it anymore when I start talking about being fat or ugly or otherwise physically impaired and substandard to the other human females out there. I guess I am, as far as I am concerned, not really all that I can be after all!
Self deception is highly effective. Works every time! Being the change you want to see in the world may just mean exactly that; being, not becoming. The difference is significant!
Being is so very much harder than becoming. Becoming involves effectuating, thinking, analyzing or coming up with great solutions. Being, on the other hand, involves presence and awareness with and of the self…..God, that is hard!
I am ready to take BKO’s invitation to do something. I am ready to accept that I may just be all that I can be already, and to stop attempting to become something I am not. I think that is how I can be the change I want to see in the world.
Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteA toast to you! For me, your comments get to the very heart of what this whole discussion has been circling and circling but never quite landing upon.
While I recognize all that the uniquely American ethos of constantly becoming, always “bettering” oneself, and endlessly achieving growth and “progress” has created from a potentially positive standpoint, I think it is also at the very heart and core of the disease of dissatisfaction that our culture both suffers from and propagates throughout the globe.
There is something very insidious about "becoming more" because, as you've stated so poignantly, it infers that something is wrong with who we are now. Therefore someone else may have the answer, the product, the miracle cure, the authority, or the power to enable us to become that mythical something that we are not.
I will deeply consider your suggestion that being the difference we want to see in the world may mean, as you suggested, being okay with who I am in the here and now. Perhaps when we are no longer desperate to "fix" ourselves or to "become" something else, we will stop worrying about what others think; and no longer fall into the repetitive loops of our own neurosis; and start having therefore the clarity of mind to know who truly needs what, when, and how.
It is at that point that I believe we may begin to be of service to ourselves and others. Because we will no longer be trying to fix someone, but simply responding to that nearly lost intuitive call inside us that alerts us to a true need; a genuine opportunity to support, help, or facilitate.
I too accept the invitation -- recognizing that it must become a practice for me to cease my striving, to stop hyperactively, recklessly running, endlessly on the treadmill to nowhere that BKO described in his commentary.
This process has been most insightful for me. Thank you to each of you for providing me with a new look at the world and my life. It all comes back to the simple formula: Be -- Do -- Have. Too often we jump right to “Have” -- or to “Do”. So very seldom do we (and I mean me) spend nearly enough time "being."
And maybe, just maybe, if I really spend the right amount of time being, the doing and having will come much more naturally, effortlessly, as part of the inherent result of who I am (instead of who I am striving to become).
With true gratitude,
Michelle
Kudos to you too, Michelle (and I am grateful that you know I value you enough that you email me when you’ve written something from the heart – thank you).
ReplyDeleteWhat you've just described sums up my own experience following the profoundly clarifying experience of dying. Somehow, in the process of nearly ceasing to "be" in the sense we are speaking of here, the gift of simply "being" became much sweeter -- a rare opportunity from which life becomes much more clear -- and, from which, what to do, as you and Anonymous have so eloquently stated, becomes a natural outgrowth thereof.
Circling back to BKO's earlier question of me, it's quite possible that what changed the most for me, following my near-death encounter, is that I became content with my life and who I am. From there what to do with and for my family; with and for my organization became remarkably easily. Any internal conflicts that may have been there between the right thing to do and what might be expedient have largely vanished.
It is also possible, that because I have come to cherish the gift of being, I also feel more deeply (as I mentioned previously). How could I not?
Have a wonderful holiday season, my friends.
(I'll carry this conversation into my gatherings with friends and family. Can't thinking of anything more appropriate to share with my loved ones.)
Sincerely,
WC
Like Lisa Lee... I know I don't have much cred with this blog... but I am into it anyway... And I know I've said some weird stuff in here before... but I was kind of messed up some of the time... oh hell... maybe a lot of the time.
ReplyDeleteBut Rizzin' and Skye and me always read this thing... you know... and we talk about it with friends at coffee... and on the beach... not true entirely... Skye and me talk... Rizzin nods his head alot... not the talkative type.
So what I'm trying to say is that we get this whole conversation... and we live it... we've slowed down our lives... and hey... we don't have a lot of things that you can buy... but we have each other and our friends. We have the ocean... the sky... sunsets... the beach... and we have simple but very awesome meals together.
I'm a very rich dude... not with dollars bro... but with life. And now that I don't get high much anymore... it's like life is even deeper... more beautiful... that might sound whacked... but it's true.
I don't think you have to die to get it... you know? The whole meaning of life thing... I mean Rizzin had whatever it was he had... being washed up on the beach and shit... but the rest of us... we got blessed with little ambition for the big game... but with a whole lot of passion for living this life like it was for keeps... you know?
Can't tell you how blessed I feel. So hell yeah! Slow down... breathe... love... take in the beauty of it all. It's a miraculous thing... you know?
Righteously loving you all,
Zee
P.S. And yeah... I'm glad the Internet freaking robots can't write stuff in this blog anymore... that totally freaked me out dude... and it didn't take much at that point to do that... but that was a total zone of its own.
Zee,
ReplyDeleteEnough with the "I don't have much cred with this group" stuff! As far as I'm concerned, most of the rest of us, me included, hell, me ESPECIALLY, are trying to catch up with you and Rizzin and Skye. Your comments are right down the pipe, as far as what I'm working on these days. And it feels good to know you're out there plugging in with us as we do it. Pass on my warmest greetings to your tribe and tell them to stay tuned, and to check in now and again. As a member of the recovering old farts contingent, I am greatly heartened by your presence here.
So we're taking turns tonight -- writing to our blog friends. Rizzin is creating something special for the holidays. It might take him a day or two.
ReplyDeleteBut, most of all, we want to wish all of you of a beautiful holiday season and let you know we hold you in our prayers and meditations each day and support you and each of us in fully stepping into the exquisite fullness for which we were created.
With love and deep gratitude,
Skye
BKO... I am humbled by your response. Wow... a true and most grateful thanks to you...
ReplyDeleteIt is always interesting for me, especially at this particular time of the year, to reflect on what past generations have thought and said and written about life, living and being. The first thing which came to mind last night as I started what has become an annual ritual of thinking out loud with my oldest son while wrapping presents, was the following:
ReplyDeleteNo man is an Island, entire of itself; every man is a piece of the Continent, a part of the main; if a clod be washed away by the sea, Europe is the less, as well as if a promontory were, as well as if a manor of thy friends or of thine own were; any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in Mankind; And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; It tolls for thee.
- John Donne (1572-1631)
Appropriate, isn’t it!
Anonymous has this incredible knack. Very often with her, the discussion starts off with simple statements and questions, all apparently related to semantics and word choice and clarity of communication, and right there, in the middle of a tranquil intellectual discussion, that’s where she gets you. Look away for even a second, and you wake up chasing her full tilt through the deepest reaches of your own heart, with no idea whatever how you got there. I’ve known her for a long time now, and I’ve seen her do it again and again. And here she is again.
ReplyDeleteIn your last post, A., you pegged it. As you and several others have mentioned, we’ve gotten ourselves all confused about the relationship between “doing” and “being”. Maybe that’s the reason we collectively keep chasing more of everything in the hopes that if we get enough of whatever we’re after that it’ll fill the hole that so many of us feel in our souls. You brought that up nicely when you said “Becoming involves effectuating, thinking, analyzing or coming up with great solutions. Being, on the other hand, involves presence and awareness with and of the self…..God, that is hard! __I am ready to…do something. I am ready to accept that I may just be all that I can be already, and to stop attempting to become something I am not.” As usual, you cut to the chase. Are “being” and “doing” separate, mutually exclusive concepts, or are they instead interconnected, interdependent parts of a larger whole? Is it possible that the real problem lies not in WHAT or WHETHER we are doing or being but in HOW we participate in the relationship between them? WC, Michelle and others have written eloquently on their experiences of this subject recently. Is that elusive thing we’re trying to find really just the thing that the mystics in all the wisdom traditions have always been talking about? Is it nothing more than, to borrow from the Buddhist story, chopping wood and carrying water? Is it a qualitative shift involving the qualities of heart and mind that we take into our action rather than simply the action itself? And as A. has pointed us toward, could that shift in heart and mind ultimately impact the actions we choose to take and fundamentally change what we choose to DO?
You have echoed what I have found to be true in my work with clients and in my own personal “recovery” process. When someone is chronically ill, it’s rarely something new they need to add to their process. It’s almost always something (usually a lot of things) that they need to stop doing need to fundamentally shift their relationships with. And that seems to hold true whether it’s bad chemical or food habits, stress jonesing and franticizing, or most commonly and importantly, calcified habits of attention generated by outdated survival messages that keep them (read: ME!) constantly striving and struggling long after striving and struggling have stopped being necessary or useful. That their bodies and lives break down under those circumstances is nothing more than the inevitable outcome of never letting down and instead, simply wearing out.
So thanks Anonymous, for helping me deepen my own process with all this. (That comment applies to a hell of a lot more than just your last post, believe me.) As I am learning to slow down, I am finding that there is much to be seen on the journey that my former pace blinded me to. And whaddaya know, those very things that I couldn’t ever see have turned out to be the missing pieces that fill the hole I was constantly speeding up to try and catch! Who knew? Goethe wrote somewhere that “There is no behavior so strange that members in good standing of the human race will not perform it.” Besides being a great poet, he must have also been a prophet, because a couple of centuries ago, he sure saw ME coming!
So, from the middle of my newly decelerating, increasingly dull, blessedly mundane life, I extend my wishes to all of you for the finest of holidays. You have all added greatly to the depth and quality of my experience in the months of this conversation, and as I raise a few glasses with my loved ones this week, I will be including you in the toast.
To my soul family:
ReplyDelete"We strive... we search... we claw at our eyes... our hearts... we beat our chests in desperation... still we do not find IT.
We sing... we chant... we pray... we dance... beating our drums we cry out in labored song... still we do not find IT.
A hint... perhaps... a momentary glimpse... oh praise be... perhaps if I work harder... labor more... run faster... prove myself...yes...
But still... little more than my own cloying desire to be more than I am... more than this measly soul can hope for.
We hope... we breathe... our last dying breath... suddenly startled we open our eyes... laughing... not quite crying... realizing at last... IT has been right here all along... simply waiting for us to stop pretending IT was somewhere other than in the essence of our very beings.
Deeply knowing this... we must now be Love."
Thanks to all of you for your contributions. I've learned much (including how vast is the expanse of what I do not know).
ReplyDeleteI look forward to a New Year and a chance to converse more with each of you. Feel free to add comments over the next week. I'll be checking in each day and will make sure they get posted.
But most importantly, from our house to yours, may you have the happiest of holidays and a blessed New Year.
Love to you all,
Christopher
Happy Holidays to all of you!
ReplyDeleteI want to comment on a number of the previous contributions made by a variety of our blog family... And I know that I've over-thought just how I might pose my response, but it goes something like this...
While truth may be relative (or subjective)... that position is often used as an excuse for not getting down to really important foundation of what IS true for us. And further just to add a little quizzical nature to my response, I'll quote my Grandpa, who used to say, "Just because it's true, don't make it right." (Cowboy wisdom -- Can you tell he was from Montana?)
So my question is... if I can get down to it... while we're peeling away the layers... letting things go... simplifying life... it seems that the guide of what to keep... focus on... or pursue would be what is True for us. What resonates in our being... what do we feel that deep passion about... not necessarily that manic "Oh my God, I've got to," kind of energy... but that more profound call that makes our soul hum.
That's what guided me... by the way... to walk away from nursing (which in retrospect, I had pursued because I thought it was "noble"... I thought it was "respectable"... I thought it was something that my family would be proud of... I thought it was the way (and maybe the only way) I could serve humanity.
But in truth... though I was genuinely moved to the depths... and learned so much from that experience... and feel it was right for me for that season in my life... it stopped being right for me at a point.
Finding my way out of the nusing profession... and walking out into the nothingness of not really knowing where I belonged or where I fit... has been one of the more challenging and faith-building experiences I've had. Sometimes life moves forward ever so slowly with such obvious uncertainty... but I am so much happier, healthier, and in love with living since I simplified my life.
Simplifying to me... means dropping all of the things that are based on borrowed values... or that we do to make us "look good" or satisfy some myth about who we need to be.
While truth may be relative... what is True for each of us must be honored by us... even if it later changes. Because by following our own True North... we will be following the inner guidance of our own soul... which I believe is our connection to the Source from which we came.
Love is the Only Power,
Jonnie
Jonnie,
ReplyDeleteYou are absolutely right on with your comment (which, BTW, also is beautifully written and communicated; thank you for that). I agree wholeheartedly. And please know that when I said that truth is relative I meant exactly what you just said. It is relative to each of us, and gives us all the task of discerning who we are in relation to our individual, as well as our collective, truth(s).
As we approach the New Year full of hope and good cheer, may I pose a rather current question?
ReplyDeleteHow does the assassination of former Prime Minister Bhutto relate to our conversation regarding our collective and individual consciousness?
What do you believe she represents in your mind? How does the U.S. reaction to her death relate to you? What does the U.S. represent in your mind?
I'm not sure if I am being too forward by asking such questions or if they're appropriate at this stage of the discussion. But since this event could be of prime significance over the coming months, I thought I would introduce this impactful event for consideration.
Sincerely,
Peter N.
Well, it's not where I had pictured the conversation going, but then what happens seldom is. In reality, Peter, you've asked the type of very relevant questions that I believe are always worth reflecting upon.
ReplyDeleteTo be direct, I see Bhutto's assassination relating to the way that we, as individuals and groups, try to invalidate or eliminate competing characters or forces in our quests for power or meaning. Sadly, what happened in this recent event has happened countless other times with great collective impact and with more subtle (but perhaps equally great collective) impact when less prominent people are killed.
Our seeming inability, as a race of beings, to share power and to collaborate with solutions is only punctuated with an exaggerated exclamation point in this and other equally prominent cases.
As for the United States' reaction? Well, it seems similar to mine and others reactions when something tragic or unplanned happens in another's life or world that upsets our plans. We immediately tend to rush in and make suggestions that would make the loss or radical shift less impactful (seemingly) on us. Once again, however, our miopic ego-centric viewpoint makes questionable everything we might offer as a suggestion to "help."
Until we have truly stepped back from the situation, detatched, and moved into a "what might truly be best for the world as a whole" position (as opposed to what preserves my "way of life"), we cannot truly offer pure service and will likely only muck things up worse.
I'll be ruminating on how this applies more because these type of events seem to carry an unconscious weight with them. I'll also be sending, love, light, and peace to the Pakistani people, Bhutto's loved ones, and the world.
May we come to live in a true state of peace, love, and understanding.
Christopher
Brother Christopher... I feel so much of what you described in your answer to Peter's questions... and it's hard to realize that our world... and deeper parts of ourselves... are still so lost as to think that the type of actions we see so regularly are solutions of any kind.
ReplyDeleteI join you in your prayers for all of the people involved... and for a world where peace, love, and understanding is just the way we are.
Love is the Only Power,
Jonnie
I hope I'm not putting a dash of bitter-root in your holiday cheer, but I have to say (being as wishful as anyone else) that the likelihood of a radical global change of collective consciousness in the near future is about as likely as the rare Bavarian cuckoo bird appearing on my doorstep with a note granting me admission into the Royal Family.
ReplyDeleteThe brain's evolution, which has occurred over many millennia, has left us with many of the natural proclivities that we now possess. I do not mean to suggest that all is lost nor that we should abandon all efforts to moderate our abhorrent behavior as a species -- on the contrary. But I do believe that we must (if we wish to approach the task with any degree of realism) concentrate on our own personal lives, thoughts, actions, and impact. For (to quote an off misunderstood master), "It is easier to remove the speck from the eye of thy neighbor, once thou hast removed the plank from thine own eye." (The man had such a gift for the metaphor, didn't he?)
With all due respect, I'd like to see some genuinely robust discussion in this regard. I’d also be fascinated to see the depths to which we are willing to plumb to possibly re-arrange the molecules of our own grey matter (and perhaps that of our hearts as well). Might there be anyone with courage enough to join me in my challenge?
With grand relish and holiday cheer abounding in all directions,
The Fat Bastard Himself
KBF... great observations. And yes, I know I'd be happy to pursue your challenge and feel, with relative certainty, that others would as well (and in some cases, if you read upstream a bit, you'll find some have already begun this process in earnest).
ReplyDeleteBut let's continue, because I think as we get down to the personal level we begin to get more potentially effective.
All the best,
Christopher
Happy New Years!
ReplyDeleteAnd... not so fast, Mr. KBF. I realize the chances of you being proclaimed to be royal may be remote... but I don't think we've begun to dig deeply enough into this whole big idea of collective consciousness to know what's possible and what's not.
May I suggest... ever so humbly... that we leave the door open to possibilities that exceed the limitations of our little teeny minds.
Love to all of you!
JJ
JJ, my charming lass, as you know -- being a good scientist -- I must always remain open to possibilities that surpasses the limited understanding of my increasingly feeble mind.
ReplyDeleteI thus await the enlightened evidence that you and others from this group of robust thinkers might provide.
With only a hint of cynicism,
The Rotund One
With every year of age, I begin to question my mental ability more, much like the very kind Mr. KBF. And perhaps it may be what one calls "delayed onset male menopause," but I am very curious about the desire many seem to have to change the world or to have some lasting impact on the collective consciousness. Is this thing necessary?
ReplyDeleteHad I ever attempted such a thing, my family would have insisted that retire years ago and would considered my desire to have been sadly foolish. But I am much less noble than many, and my visions of saving a world not as pure.
Never having tried to change something so large, I have wondered -- and I could be very mistaken -- but I have a question. Maybe what some of you have called the "collective consciousness" has no desire and no need of change. Are we sure it exists at all? If it does, I'm not sure it would like us to be talking about it or making secret plans to make it be something else. Am I not well informed? Or maybe just making excuses for my laziness?
This could certainly be. But, if by chance my delusion has some value, I would humbly suggest that each journey to wholeness is a very personal path undertaken by one.
While it may be true that any journey to remember our wholeness and to live this truth might have effect on the minds and hearts of many, it is not our duty, nor should it be, to change the minds and hearts of others. To attempt to do so would be violation of their right to be where they are. And if there is a collective mind, trying to change it would only seem to lead to it being more stubborn.
If we were all to realize this and cease to strive to change the other, maybe we could finally be able to do the truly important work of cleaning our own pond by allowing it to be refreshed with pure clean water from the Source so that the stench from our stagnation stops smelling up the neighborhood.
But then look at me. This is most embarassing. I am seeking to influence you. It appears that all of my words then are really meant for me. How foolish of me to suggest that anyone else might need to perform what is so clearly my job.
Please forgive my useless thoughts. May you forget them quickly.
With respect,
Trinh
First (and I just have to say this), I have rarely been in communication with folks less deserving of a "useless" label than you, Trinh! So there!
ReplyDeleteThat said, my beloved and I undertook an exercise (much to our own surprise, I must note) this morning, and it completely changed everything we have done thus far in our 9+ years of relationship. We faced a challenge square by showing up for each other as INDIVIDUALS, and not as the amorphous and deceptive entity we have tried to employ previously when facing the same challenge. We were able to find infinitely more strength as an entity comprised of two very aware and very present individuals than we have ever been able to generate while attempting to “overlay” each others egos and create an US. In fact, we accidentally created the US we always have wanted to be simply by showing up as individuals. Oh, the irony!
Trinh, my dear, you are so right. Individual responsibility, awareness and action appears to be much more effective than attempting to force or coerce collective change; and, incidentally (or maybe not), the individual perspective, when faced and owned up to, creates a collective foundation from which we can all spring and belong without compromising our individual energies. Allelujah!
Anonymous, you are far too kind. But I appreciate your thoughts and am pleased that you and your beloved one have found peace in understanding that two whole people make far better partners than two people struggling to find their wholeness in the other.
ReplyDeleteIt was many years before I realized this wisdom myself. My wife was most patient in waiting for me to catch up with her. Now she smiles a lot. I ask her why she smiles. She says it's nothing. But I know she is quietly pleased that I finally know this simple truth and can be at peace with her.
May kindness and harmony be with you always,
Trinh
Trinh, you are indeed a slippery one, my fellow. You have foiled my plan to create a verbal scuffle amongst our bloglings.
ReplyDeleteJust when I was poised to pounce upon anyone's insipid ideas of how we might all change the collective consciousness, you sweep the entire idea of the table so deftly, that I could not even hear my idea crash as it fell to pieces like so much cheap dinnerware.
I must also confess that I am very much in agreement with your assessment. Whether that brings comfort or fear to others is something each must determine for their own self.
With Much Fondness and Respect,
The Corpulent One
Well, my friends, I believe it's time to advance this topic to the next round. So please make any additional comments in the new topic: "Genius in Action: What's Your Ripple Effect?"
ReplyDeleteI'm truly appreciative of all of the ideas, comments, and contributions of everyone who's taken the time to participate actively. I also know there's a number of people who write me that they often read this blog, but haven't yet commented for a variety of reasons. I definitely respect everyone's right to participate in whatever way is appropriate for them, and I also encourage anyone reading this blog to comment. We will most assuredly benefit from more voices and fresh perspectives.
Kind regards,
Christopher
Reply: Genius Fiddling While Rome Burns -What Might Africa, The Middle East, and Global Warming Tell Us About Our Personal and Collective Mind?
ReplyDeleteI love the naked metaphor for our responsibility in our world in the previous blog, it ties nicely to this blog.
We create our world with our thoughts according to the law of attraction. If I believe I have this level of power, it seems obvious that we are at this point in our world. One only has to look at the programming that has occurred in our mass media that we take in without a worry to its collective destructive outcome. If I just look at it from a scientific point of view, it’s still obvious, that I am responsible not only for myself, but the whole world. But being realistic, I am not going to start a new green peace organization. I am a working class hero, I have a family, and I will also, like everyone one else, hope that someone else can take up the bang wagon of saving the world. Still, I make a difference because my thoughts are in the possibility of tomorrow, if I believe in the law of attraction, and I make a difference because in a non metaphysical sense, I do my part to separate the trash and try to be as green as possible, although I know 80% just goes back into the same dump. I buy long last light bulbs, maybe, I can make a difference. But I too still want my car, hot water, heated home, and freedom to just sit around with my family in our easy life. I know Americans care, although Europeans and other countries criticize us, we think in our own minds that we are doing good in the world, that we are making a difference. We don’t want to think and realize that our business empire is stripping the rest of the world, so my daughter can have a baby alive this Christmas.
So the science says we are doomed, so why bother.
But I believe in the law of attraction. I believe in an America like in World War II that when faced with a challenge can accomplish anything. I believe and choose to focus on a world of unlimited possibility to live into!